Unworthy Sabotage

Well, It's been a while, but not because I didn't want to, and not because I was hiding behind a mountain of shame. I've been busy. I am very grateful for my wonderful new jobs. This is even more than I wanted, but I love them all. The only problem is that having to go to bed because I have work in the morning puts a big damper on my writing time. Tonight I am making an exception. Surely I will get my routine down soon to make time for my very favorite hobby.

I figured out why I was in that food funk as I referred to in my last post. Things were/are going VERY well. So well, in fact, that deep down I feel I don't deserve it. I was actually eating even though I didn't want it as a form of sabotaging myself. Is that sick-weird or what?!?!?! After I unloaded a bit of ponder in my last post, I was able to hear clearly enough to diagnose the problem. Thank God there is a solution. The truth is that I AM enough, and none of us deserve anything, but we also deserve everything because we get what Jesus deserves. That can be a hard bite to swallow when we know ourselves, but it IS the truth. I just have to keep regaining my sight of who I am. I choose to believe the truth. Because of that I have not been eating like a crazy person this week.

Nutritional Nugget: More about critters....Botulism --- YIKES

I always have to laugh because I remember my very first lecture on this little guy. My professor said, "Little old farmer wives would open a can of her home-canned green beans. Taste it to see if it is good. Then be dead before supper."

Clostridium botulinum, (I like to say that name,) is an anaerobic bacteria. That means it thrives in areas with no air like in canned foods. As best as I can remember, it is tasteless and odorless. It is possible to kill with heat, but it needs to be pressurized heat like in a pressure cooker where the temperature gets to about 250 degrees. The best way to avoid botulism is to practice safe techniques. Dented cans should be avoided, especially if the can is bulging or dented on the seam. If you roll a can on the counter and there is no bump, that is, it rolls smoothly, then the can is probably okay, but I personally would not use it. Obviously, if you drop a can and it dents just before you are going to cook it, it is okay to use. But I always, always, always "fill-up" the cans twice at the grocery store before purchasing. Once when I put it in the cart, then again at check out.

Another classic way to prevent botulism is to avoid giving infants honey. No honey until age two. Age three in some circles.

All about my struggles

I've been having a hard time eating "right" lately. It is like I want to eat everything in sight, and if it is not good for me, I want to eat it double. I think those of you who actually read this blog might be able to pick up on a pattern with me. When I go without posting for a while, it seems to go hand in hand with how "bad" or "good" I am doing with my eating. It's not that I don't want to post if I'm not doing well. It is just that I don't think about posting or I don't have the "write" in me. Today I find myself in this drought (again,) but I have been wanting to get back on here. I decided just to vent the struggles I seem to be having. Maybe this bit of confessing will pop open whatever seems to be causing a desire to eat junk that I really don't want, and the ability to write about it.

Last time I went to the grocery store I actually bought...(this is terrible)...a box of Little Debbie Swiss Rolls. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Now in the recent past, I have been able to have junk in the house with no desire to eat it. I'm telling you that was a mistake that has cost me 270 calories a day.

I've also been dehydrated the past few days as evidenced by pee color. I know that is gross, but pee is supposed to be clear or almost clear. I know this, and I still had coffee for breakfast and sweet tea for lunch yesterday. I know I feel better when I drink water. My flesh prefers junk, but I can tell deep down that I don't really want that. Why have I been making choices I don't want to make? It is like I have a preconceived idea of foods that i would enjoy more, and I find myself indulging in them even more than my flesh wants just because they're the "bad" food.

Well...I think I stumbled on one reason just now. I still have some rewriting to do on the ol' heart. I categorize foods as bad and good. That makes a law out of it...."Oh I can't have the bad food." Phooey! When life goes to rocking, that little heart ponder will come to the surface, and I find myself eating a Little Debbie Swiss Roll because I think I want what I think I can't have. ...That is just not truth.

I'm sure there are more reasons....

Nutritional Nugget: Cross Contamination
On facebook the other day, my cousin asked a question about food pathogens. It is a subject that I've heard so much and taught so often that I'm fairly tired of it, but apparently he is really interested in it. In honor of cuz, I think I'll talk about food safety and sanitation which is really a very important part of nutrition. It's actually even listed on the Healthy People list.

Cross contamination is when a food comes in contact with bacteria associated with one food because of poor handling techniques. An examples of this is if someone diced celery with the same knife and cutting board they used to cut chicken. This can also happen if a person forgot to wash their hands when preparing cookie dough with raw eggs and then touched the cookies they just removed from the oven. The best way to prevent cross contamination is to use good food handling practices.