Breaking the Age Barrier

I met a wonderful lady this past week who really inspired me. She seemed to be one of those sweet, tiny, gray-headed, ladies who sings in her church choir and keeps her cupboards stocked full of ingredients for healthy meals she likes to make for people under the weather. I would bet she makes a perfect apple pie or blackberry cobbler, but would be full after eating more than one or two bites herself. She was proud of her children and grandchildren who proved to be upstanding members of society. She was lovely and at a healthy weight. She emitted inner peace that comes with a life well-lived. It was obvious that she had learned which things in life were really important and which things to let go. 

 

She looked as if she had been dainty all her life. I watched her portion healthy foods to her plate then sit down to savor them. I was surprised to learn that this little lady used to be a hundred pounds overweight. She was obese during most of her adult life and decided about fifteen years ago that she was ready to lose weight. She changed her eating and cooking habits. She began moderate exercising. She lost her excess weight and kept it off by applying good nutrition principles to her lifestyle and forming new habits. Eating is effortless for her now. 

 

Lots of people have weight success stories, and I’m inspired each time I hear one. Her story was different though. I was especially encouraged because of WHEN she accomplished her goal. She did not let age hinder her from something she wanted. She had grandchildren before she decided her weight would and should come off. I believe that sometimes we find ourselves in an age-cage that prevents our desires from coming into fruition. It is never too late! Every obstacle we build around ourself is really an imaginary one. The age barrier is no different. I know it is easy to hold on to past regrets and feel as though a portion of our life was wasted somehow. We tend to exalt time in our life when really it is just a tool we use in our world. What matters now is now. Life doesn’t end at 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80, or 90. It’s never too late to start living. 

 

This lady defied the age barrier. She had lived a good life. Her children were gone and raising children of her own. They would be retiring in state across the country.   She recognized that life was just beginning. She put all the past behind her including the weight she carried around for decades, and made a new life for herself. That Is Impressive! 

 

I wonder….what would I do if I didn’t’ know how old I am? What would I do if I forgot about things that happened and choices I made in the past? What would you do? It's not to late to start living today to get the life we always wanted.  

Y R U FAT

I heard Richard Simmons say once that he either had or saw a license plate that read, "YRUFAT".

So take a second to think about the answer to that question.  What is the reason that people are overweight?     Do you have an answer?   Okay, then read on.

I suppose there are a bunch of reason, but basically people usually either say lack of exercise, poor diet, or genetics/health.

There is new study from a group at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor that says people who name lack of exercise as the main cause of obesity are more likely to be heavier than those who believe poor diet is the culprit.    More than two-thirds of adults in the United States are overweight.   Inactivity and genetics are definitely factors, but evidence says the main reason is over eating. Portion Control is the Key!

Wayne and I got a gym membership once that came with a visit from a personal trainer.  One of the first things the guy said was, "losing weight is about 90% diet and the rest exercise."   It appears Mr. 2% Body Fat was 100% right.

The findings from McFerran and colleagues suggest that beliefs about weight influence food choices.

I believe in balance and a big picture.  I know myself enough to know that a little exercise may not burn as many calories as limiting portions, but it does elevate stress which makes me not want to stress eat.  It curbs my appetite so I automatically eat less without trying.  It makes me sleep better so I feel rested.  When I'm sleepy I tend to eat more.  After I exercise I have a real deep-down feeling of goodness so I'm less likely to try to get that feeling from taste.

But on the other hand, people tend to think that they can eat more if they exercise.  There has to be a partnership between the two with diet being the leader of the team.  Everything has its place and works together to make health work.   Life feels better when we wear it where it fits.

Secret Eating

Secrets are darkness.

There is a big difference between secrets and whispering sweet nothings.   It has to do with the motive.  Sweet whispers are to and about the good person you whisper to.   We don't allow secrets in our house, but we do whisper a lot of sweet nothings.

 One of my favorite stories has to do with sweet nothings.  Luke was about three or four.  I whispered in his ear, "I think you are amazing."  Then he whispered in my ear, "Did you not realize I have had diarrheas since Easters?"  (He was quoting Nacho Libre.)

Everything has to be brought to the light.  If you don't want the person to hear it, don't say it behind closed doors.  I've learned that lesson harshly.  It seems hidden words spoken in darkness are the most dangerous of all.  If we realize that, then how can light bring life to other areas?

Imagine how pleased I was when a coworker said she once attended a diet class where someone said, "Don't eat in secret."  Um Genius times a million!   That really resonated with me.

Secret foods nourish an unhealthy desire.....a.k.a fill a deprivation. Let's ask ourselves...

What are we ashamed of to cause us to hide and eat?

Why don't we feel free enough to enjoy it in the light?

...And if we are in the light, would we really want it?

Deprivation

What do you think of when you hear the word, "deprivation?"  I get all sorts of ugly images in my head.  A thirsty desert walker is the first thing that comes to mind....and it feels ugly.

Deprivation is destructive.

I went on a diet about 40 pounds or so ago because I thought I was SOOOOOOOOOO FAT. Blardy blar blarr!  I think it was my friend Heather (Hey girl) who once posted something like, "I wish I weighed what I weighed when I thought I was fat."    Yep...Me too, friend.  Me too...   Anyway, I was absolutely mortified to sign up for the diet program.  "No self-respecting dietitian would ever be caught in a weight loss meeting." I thought.  The anxiety was astonishing because I was afraid someone would ask me what I "do for a living."  Can you believe how ridiculous I was?  Good Lawdy!  So I paid good money to show up every week to be weighed.  And every week I weighed heavier and heavier. I would have been better off to stay away from diets altogether!   The scale lady finally gave me a good talkin'.    "Did you realize you gained another 3 pounds this week?  You are eating too much because you feel deprived..."  Then she added a whole bunch "good tips" to help persuade my weight to go the other direction.  I have NO idea what she said at all.  She lost me at "deprivation."  How can anyone do anything in a state of deprivation....a mentality of lack....thirsty in the desert?  There is one thing on that person's mind and it is not the Top Ten Tips To Trim and Healthy.  The thing on their mind is the thing they are deprived of.  I went to classes that gave me rules. The only thing I could think of, the only thing I desired was the things they told me I shouldn't have. The strength of sin is the law, peeps!

Thank God for a boundless life  and for having eyes to see and ears to hear how to get there.

I posted about an inspirational gal a little while back who over four years lost her weight to reach a life of health free from pills.  One thing she says often to me is, "I know myself enough to know I can't feel deprived."    Eating something not in "the plan" is less dangerous than feeling deprived.  She knows the signs of deprivation only lead to trails of treacherous terrain.  Let's not go down that path.

Wayne is exercising and losing weight like crazy. He has now lost 24 pounds.  What! What!  He literally eats what he wants.  He often says, "If you want it, you better go ahead and eat it.  Don't let yourself feel deprived."   Getting free from deprivation is an important lesson to learn on the journey to health.

This life is to be enjoyed.  Let's not get distracted with feelings of deprivation.

The very first post I ever wrote was about the beginning of this weight loss journey and the beginning of "Worth The Weight."  (I was different back then.  Things were more about instruction and obedience than recognizing a oneness and living out of who I am.) In the beginning,  I had been trying to lose some weight and had decided that I was going to "pray" about every single food I would put in my mouth.  Spirit-lead eating.  That would lead to health wouldn't it?  You tell me what to eat, and I'll eat it.  So I did.  I ended up eating a bunch crap out of "obedience to the Lord."   (Are you laughing?)  Nothing I ate would be something I would recommend on a weight loss plan.  So after some crazy meals, I finally asked the Lord, "Um....why do I feel lead to eat all this junk?"  Then he said to me, "Because I want you to see that you are more valuable than what you put in your mouth."  ---I'm worth the weight. And so the road to what I thought was weight loss, was really just a road to self-acceptance, contentment, and rest.

Believe me I know that sounds crazy.  I am really trying hard to be more scientific in my writings, but that really is what happened.  I sort of had a concept of those Jesus-type things.  But acceptance, value, and contentment were things I really only knew in my head.  It would be a good two years before I fully understood with my heart.  Fast forward and I understand freedom from food and weight like never before.  I'm still heavy but it feels like LIFE is just rolling out of me.  I know I still have a lot of weight to lose before I reach my goal weight, but I already feel like I'm living right there.  I don't care what people think or say.  I say things and react to people as if I'm already that healthy weight.  I'm free from feeling deprived.  I had to find who I was at the core before nutritional guidelines could help me out.  Information of nutrition enhances this desire for health like sea salt on a plate of steamed vegetables. I crave to know more because it promotes my desires and enhances the pleasure of health.  I've got so much to share about nutrition and feeding our bodies, but I'm still caught up on this FREEDOM high.

Things are definitely changing.  I went to an exercise class with a bunch of skinnies----I mean really skinnies as in they had arm definition and everything.  Seriously my left thigh weighs more than they do.  I had a BLAST!  Before my change of perspective, all I would have done was compare myself to those good lookin' people. The only thing I would have learned from the class is how much I didn't measure up. Now the voice of deprivation is no longer my teacher.  I enjoyed my class as I enjoy my life.  There is no comparison, because I'm there too....I just don't look like it on the outside quite yet. Sorry, Billy Crystal, but it is better to FEEL good instead of Look good.

I eat what I want seasoned with good nutrition knowledge.  I've lost an average of about a half of a pound everyday.  It's easy.  It's exciting.  It's enjoyable.  Last night the boys asked their daddy to make breakfast for supper.  For those of you illiterate in breakfast, you should know it is NOT an egg white omelet with organic blueberries and a small multi-grain vegan muffin.   We live in the South, Peeps!  We are talking homemade biscuits, scrambled eggs, sausage, chocolate gravy....you know.  The works!   So I decided to eat some.  Even while I was eating it I was thinking, "I don't want this."  But I didn't stop myself.  After I lapped up the plate, I really regretted it.  Not because of the expensive sugar and fat calories, but because I felt so yucky.  It had been a while since I had felt the food-yuck.  Thankfully, I woke up this morning and had still lost another half of a pound.  All day I've thought about that meal. I deprived my body of the pleasure of health---feeling good--- because I ate something that I thought I loved.  Oh it is still tasty.  But seriously that few minutes of taste was not worth replacing the pleasure of feeling good. 

Plain and simple: If we have feelings of deprivation, we are not seeing clearly.  No pressure, my friends.  Freedom will come.  Even our diets are boundless!  Even expectations of ourselves are only illusions! There is no thirst that cannot or has not been quenched.   The strong man has been bound.  The struggle is gone. We are worth more than we think.   Just rest!  Our bodies are designed for health!   Let's love ourselves enough to let health happen! 

The Un-facts of Nutrition

I'm going to say some things that you probably wouldn't find in a nutrition journal.  I'm going to say them because my journey to health is a whole lot more than just the facts.  Let's be honest.  If information was the biggest influence on health, America would not be the second fattest country on the planet.  Sometimes it is simply just not having the right information,  but often the root for the weight runs deeper than any adipose cell in our body.


I really believe the weight we carry on the outside is reflective of the weight on the inside. (Too big or too small.)


I believe that sometimes we overfeed  ourselves to fill up a need we think we have.   Or we starve ourselves because we feel too unworthy to take up space.


I believe that being heavy gives us some sort of sense that we belong in this world.


I believe an addiction to food is bondage.


I believe in a lot of weighty-matters, but more than any those things....I believe in freedom. 


I meet people all the time who have a greater body mass index (BMI) than I do and not because of muscle mass either.


BMI is just ratio of weight and height that can be used as an assessment tool to identify nutritional status.  From a BMI, we can identify people who are underweight, healthy weight, over weight, obese, or morbidly obese.


To hear someone with an unhealthy BMI (low or high) pour their heart out about their situation is really something special.  I'm often in awe of people's situations.  I'm trained to assess where they are and give them facts to how to reach healthy goals.  I get paid to teach when I'm actually always learning from them.  It is amazing to me that some of the struggles they share are things I've also struggled with at times.

How many diets have I been on in my life that only lead to weight gain?


How many pictures have I not been in because I was embarrassed?


How much anxiety, guilt, frustration have I felt because "I should, but I can't."


It's over.  I mean it is really, really, really over!!!


I've tasted freedom before.  I've lost some weight.  I'm trending down.  But I always had this voice in the back of my mind.  "What if its not permanent?"  "What if I fall back into old habits."  "What if...what if...what if?"  And guess what?  Remembering bondage always made me look backward.  Do we think focusing on the problem creates a solution?  No!  What we focus on becomes bigger.  It sure is hard to run forward when you keep looking back.  Even if you can keep running without stumbling, you miss the exquisite view.

Freedom is not just a snack any more.  It's the main course.  It's the meat and potatoes. It's the central line. It is what keeps this baby rolling.


Freedom used to be in a tug of war with fear.  I had gotten to the place where freedom was stronger.  I was making headway.  But every now and then that fear would give a big jerk, and I would struggle a bit.   Still, I kept pulling.


I struggled because I saw an area in my life where I didn't measure up.  Come on now! I can calculate a BMI faster than I can remember the names of ex-boyfriends. I know I fall off the nutrition charts, but I no longer struggle in my mind!   I'm not naive.  I know what I weigh.  It's just that now, I can see clearly without sins of the past casting a shadow on my path.


Now everything is different.  The rope has been severed.  Where did the fear go?  I don't know.  All that remains now is freedom.  How can I struggle when there is nothing to struggle with?


It's so easy really, but it was so hard for me at times to smear Grace on the weight loss issue.  It just took a little time.  I would get a better view then fall back.  Get a deep understanding then stumble again.  The Texas Two Step.


I had lots of mantras I tried to adopt.  You know those things you repeat to yourself while your chugging up a hill or shopping at the grocery store....


"Baby step across the finish line."


"You are not what you weigh."


"Slow and steady wins the race."


"Whatever it takes."


All of those are great, but I finally have one that resonates with every single fiber of my being!"


LET HEALTH HAPPEN


When I hear that, I feel this journey is not at all about my efforts.  It means that no matter what I do, my body was created for health.  Health will happen!  It is my nature to allow it.  It is my nature to provide an environment for health to happen in.  The struggles are gone.  I live in total freedom!  I can eat what I want!  It is just that I choose to have long-lasting pleasure from health instead of momentary pleasure from taste that only keeps me from the real deal.  I desire foods and activities that is conducive to a life style of health. Food no longer has a hold on me.  It is something to be enjoyed.   It is hard to interpret revelation into English words, but I hope you have ears to hear.


This is not about finding my place in this world.  It's not about being a good example or trying to improve myself.  It's about living, resting, and enjoying life.  If there is anything I know about the Creator, it is that he is good.  I mean REALLY, REALLY good.  It's that this life was created to be enjoyed (PERIOD!)  I was never meant to live in a cage of rules, laws, expectations from anyone or myself.  I was created to bask in absolute freedom.  To be happy, content, at rest, inner peace, present....whatever you want to call it...but it is good.


I began to "see" about two yeas ago.  I recently posted a success story of someone who took four years to find her place.  You may not feel as free as I do, or you may feel freedom more.  Let's not compare.  We are on level ground here.  Everyone find their own path.  Let's just get out and walk in the light that we have.


The best advice I ever got was from a man who I first heard the pure message of grace. I told him that I felt like I've been standing in front of a wall for years.  He came and knocked down that wall, and all it did for me was show me how far I have to go.  He gave me a hug and simply said, "Just rest."

That was about six years ago now.  That resonated, but I didn't really understand it.  Today I feel at rest.  At this place of rest, I am content.  I am happy.  I can let health happen.


Oh and I lost another pound!  It's happening and it's happening in freedom!

Wayne's Revelation of Health

I am more excited about this post than anything ever.  I can't even decide what to title it because it is just so huge within me right now.   This is a game changer.  Wayne is always doing this to me....FOR me.   He gets these revelations that absolutely change my life.  This revelation is from a guy who now has lost 21 pounds in five weeks.  Overnight a desire for health was birthed in him and everyday it accelerates.  This is not a weight loss plan, but a lifestyle.  I'm proud of him, and very thankful that I have a guy who has a relationship with a loving Heavenly Father so that he influences our family and infects us with LIFE!  I've written before about this journey being about perspective.  Tonight Wayne shared his perspective with me, and we are sharing it with you below.   I can feel deep down that this is a key puzzle piece to my personal journey of health.  I hope it resonates with you as much as it did me....


     "My perspective is changing about weight loss.  We always view losing weight as hard, so we dread it, put it off, and just avoid the mirror or the camera.  Actors gain and loose weight all the time for the roles they play.  They do not view it as hard.  It's just part of the job.  It is actually harder for us to stay fat.  We have to really work hard to keep the weight on.   Our bodies want to be healthy, and it rewards us by feeling good.  We automatically gravitate to what we think will be pleasure.  We substitute a moment of something tasting good for feeling good all the time.  Taste is an illusion.  It's an inoculation for health.  Just wake up and allow yourself to be who you were designed to be.  You have to stay deceived to stay fat."
     "Deprivation is another misconception.  When anyone speaks of "going on a diet," in the back of our minds we think diet=deprivation.  I don't do diets.  This is simply my lifestyle.  If at any point in this journey I feel deprived, it simply indicates that I am still deceived in some area.  I eat exactly what I want.  We deprive ourselves when we constantly force more food in than our bodies need or want.  We feel bad, and it is hard feeling bad all the time.  It had been so long for me that I forgot what it felt like to feel good.  You could call it an addiction.  I didn't have to fight to overcome an addiction. That would have been too hard.  I just traded it for a stronger one.  I went from a momentary satisfaction to one that is complete and perpetual, and it feels great." ---Wayne Blaylock


...I find that seeing from that perspective brings life to me.  It makes me want to go run another mile!  I do want to expound on his inoculation comment.   Inoculation is when you get just enough of something so that you don't get the real thing.  It is like immunizations. The doctor gives you a shot of the disease.  Your body sets up a defense for it at that time so if you ever come in contact with it again you won't get the disease.  Wayne is saying that we inoculate ourselves with a moment of pleasure so that we don't obtain the real pleasure of health.   We have found that logic to be true in many areas of our lives, and now we see its relevance in our journey to health.  I feel like I can see even more clearly now.   I think I can love myself enough to let health happen.   I. Am . EXCITED!

Bragging on Mr. Blaylock

For those of you who follow this blog, I just want to say it's an honor that you share this journey with me for better or worse.  It's amazing what a little midnight confession via blog will do for you.   It was liberating for me to get to share my frustrations, struggles, and feelings of inadequacies in recent posts. Often it takes me getting  real to see clearly.  The fog has lifted, and I found the fun again.  I'm feeling extra motivated today!  (By the way, I'm another pound down! Woo Woo!)

...But today's post is not about me  I get to brag a little about Mr. Blaylock!  Where do I start?  Oh how about he's lost 18 pounds in four weeks!  Holla!

Actually, he's lost so much weight so quickly that we are having to watch to make sure it's not too fast.  GRADUAL weight loss is desired.  The slower the loss, the greater the likelihood of permanent weight loss.  Rapid weight loss is mostly loss of water and lean body mass.  The goal is FAT loss which is done at a slower pace. (More on this later.)

We often have eyes bigger than our stomach.  Sometimes we desire more than we need or can handle in eating as well as in weight loss.  Remember it took a long time to pack on the pounds.  It's not all going to just disappear.  Think "health" instead of "weight loss."   We want to be a healthy weight, and there is a healthy way to get there.  It seems like a lot of work to only lose 1/2 to 2 pounds each week, but that's the recommended weight loss goal.  Of course, a bigger person might lose more at first, but the loss per week should taper down as the weight lowers.  If HEALTH is your goal, then the food choices seem more effortless and the slow weight loss is just a fruit of your good choices. 

So back to the hubs...    It all started when I took some photos of him. He was embarrassed of how he looked in the pictures.  This somehow revved the engine of health, and he literally changed overnight.   We typically have nutritious family meals, but  Wayne's super-sized motivation has transformed our whole family into health even more.  He is being a great example for our boys.  They  have such a healthy view of eating and exercise.

So how has he done it?  The good old-fashioned way!   Wayne has been monitoring his portion sizes.  He still eats regular foods but might only have one piece of pizza.  He quit eating late at night.  He chooses more fruits and vegetables.  He drinks tons of water.  I think he forgot soft drinks exist.  Neither of us are buying junk food now.  His stomach growls more often, and he eats when it growls.  The biggest change is how active he is.

Exercise is priority for him, and the transformation has been amazing.  He makes sure he gets in a good aerobic workout almost everyday.  He began slowly at first by walking two miles. He is now up to jogging four miles almost everyday, plus tennis, bicycling, practicing tee-ball, or jogging while pushing the stroller.  The fun things with the boys don't count in his exercise routine.  These activities are just extra little goodies that have ultimately earned him an eighteen-pound intentional weight loss. 

It's changed our family dynamics.  We can't really exercise together since our guys are so little.  Somebody has to be on call.  Tonight there was only about thirty minutes of daylight left after the tee ball game.  Wayne let me be the one to close down the day.   I so loved jogging at sunset!  Then I did bedtime while Wayne ran on a treadmill at his fantastic sister's house.  We are still figuring out how to fit and increase our physical activity into our busy life.  It's just another piece of our family puzzle.  There is a place it will fit. Sometimes it means that I walk the driveway after the sun has gone down.  Sometimes Wayne stops by the university stadium to run the stairs on the way back home after errands.   Last night, Wayne started supper then I took over cooking when I got home and he went for his run.  By the time he got back, supper was ready.  We ate together as a family.  The menu was lean hamburger steak with sauteed mushrooms, mashed potatoes, steamed carrots, and crowder peas.  The boys had a frosting-free pumpkin cupcake for dessert.   We started the bedtime procedures then I went for my jog.  Quite a juggling act, and we are getting better with plenty of planning and practice.  My cousin recently told me that she and her husband got to go for a jog together the other day and it felt like a date.  I'm beginning to understand that.     

I'll keep you posted on his weight loss journey as well as mine.  Now I'm REALLY enjoying this journey!   It's so much fun to have the whole family super motivated and enjoying this journey together.